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Divorce is a state of affairs that many families in the world have been going through, and it is a gradual process that finally leads to family break-ups. A bigger portion of the divorces happened in households where there are young children and given their age, and they continually do not have an idea on how to handle the situation. Therefore, they are continually affected the most; as they are forced to learn and adapt to the changes that come with their parent’s divorce which can both affect them in a positive or a negative way.
The Effects of Divorce on Children
Although the process of divorce is never good, sometimes it may come with positive outcomes to the children of the affected couples. It might allow some kids and parents a chance to get happiness mostly if the couples used to be in a constant fight before the divorce. The separation between the parents can be a better idea for their kids as they will not continue watching them fight anymore. It can be healthy when kids grow up in a stable environment free from an abuse of any nature on them or their siblings.
Regularly, divorces have negative impacts on the children as it may force them to be alienated and end up losing their self-esteem, suffer mistrust, deal with parental favoritism or even lack adequate financial assistance for their education. Most children lose their self-esteem because they do not have the relationship that they had developed with both of the parents and this makes them suffer than kids with both parents. When a child grows up with divorced parents, he/she may find it difficult to trust both parents equally as one of them may have made attempts to blame the other for the break-up. Such children always develop trust issues with either of the parents hence finding it difficult to share their real feelings with them. The conflict of loyalty gets into play them when the divorce process is messy, and they may feel the obligation to choose one parent. Such situations can be extremely traumatizing for them as they are forced to lose the past love they had for both the parents.
As an effect of divorce, kids always pass through various behavioral and emotional distress for them to adapt to life after separation of their parents. The problem can be understood by assessing the form of situation that the kid is struggling to cope with after the divorce (Fagan et al. 22). Such kids always go through different emotional changes such as anger with the parent they feel initiated the actual divorce, a feeling of betrayal, sadness, loneliness and abandonment. Therefore, these kids may find it difficult to develop new friends and make adjustments to the new environment, and hence this will, in turn, make them get poor grades compared to the performance they used to have when everything was within their comfort.
In summary, before couples make a decision to divorce, they need to consider their kids first and then the long term effects the process may have to all the parties involved. They can seek a family counseling to understand the move and its possible implications. Divorce can be the easiest way out of a problematic marriage for the couples, but it can as well be the door to a catastrophe in the kid’s social and psychosocial wellbeing.
Fagan, Patrick F., and Churchill, Aaron. "The effects of divorce on children." Marriage & Religion Institute, 12, 2012, pp. 1-48.
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