Areas for Improvement

Give your essay a catchy title and an engaging introduction to attract the attention of your intended audience. (appeal with logic, ethics, or emotion).

The paper appeals to logic rather than ethics or emotion by using a catchy title ("A problem Exists") and an engaging opening line.

Include a strong, pertinent thesis in the opening line. (With revised thesis statement.)

The paper is unable to produce a tenable, comprehensible thesis statement that is pertinent to the analysis of the subject under consideration.

Give a brief description of the issue's background and current state as well as a summary of the issue(s) that require attention. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs.

The author succeeds in fully examining the history of the theme by alluding to events in 2008 through to 2011.

The history is a bit too disorganized and brief.

4. Explain the first problem (economic, social, political, environmental, complexity, inequity, ethical/moral, etc.) and provide support for your claims. This should be one or two (1- 2) paragraphs.

The author fails to succinctly examine the parameters of the first problem as it is only limited to the ethical problem. Additionally, the paragraph is too brief.

5. Explain the second problem (economic, social, political, environmental, complexity, inequity, ethical/moral, etc.) and provide support for your claims. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs.

The second issue is succinctly captured as it involves the examination of the economic segment of the problem

6. Explain the third problem (economic, social, political, environmental, complexity, inequity, ethical/moral, etc.) and provide support for your claims. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs.

The social aspect of the problem is also fully captured. The author succeeds in exploring the social implications of the thematic concern.

7. Use effective transitional words, phrases, and sentences throughout the paper.

The author fails to involve the appropriate transitional words and thus hindering the flow of the essay.

8. Provide a concluding paragraph that summarizes the stated problems and promises a solution.

The paper provides a concluding paragraph which fully summarizes the problems and promises a solution

9. Develop a coherently structured paper with an introduction, body, and conclusion

Indeed, the author succeeds in developing a coherently structured paper with introduction, body and conclusion

10. Support claims with at least three (3) quality, relevant references. Use credible, academic sources available through Strayer University’s Resource Center.

The author succeeds in fully documenting the relevant and up to date references. The number of references was 7 which is much more than the required 3

11. Other