arranged marriage and love marriage

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Marriage is a socially or constitutionally recognized marriage between two individuals who choose to leave as partners of intimate partnerships. Even though marriage can be narrowly defined as an institution of rights and obligations for the marrying parties, the presence of cultural diversity gives rise to various meanings of the word marriage, and thus subsequent styles of marriages emerge. Marriages are divided into two types: love marriages and arranged marriages (Pande 172). The key contrast between the two is that in a romantic marriage, the wedding parties follow the marriage institution based on love, while in an arranged marriage, the parties pursue the marriage institution based on affection the marrying parties base their decisions on a set of compatibility factors or the family-wide decisions. Even though these types of marriage have major differences in terms of autonomy, and familiarity, post-marriage problems are common to both (Mir et al. 51).

First, a love marriage offers the partner’s freedom to choose their suitors based purely on love, whereas an arranged marriage gives little or no freedom of choice to the partners as this decision remains solely with their respective families. Even though the love marriage might seem advantages at a glance, the freedom of choice is accompanied with individual responsibility for any repercussions exhibited in the post-marriage life (Pande 172).

Second, in love marriage expectations are best on past experiences between the couples while in arranged marriage, expectations are purely based on the future. Since a love marriage is based on love, the parties involved have to worry little about what their families will perceive of such a union. As an alternative, priority is given to the love between the two partners. On the other hand, priority in arrange marriages is given to compatibility between the families from which potential suitors emanate, hence focus is placed more on the union between the two families than the marrying parties (Regan 915).

Third, in a love marriage, partners have prior familiarity with each other while in an arrange marriage, partners only know each other deeper after the marriage. Prior to pursuing a love marriage, partners often engage in courtship first. This courtship period allows them to gain deeper knowledge of each other (Mir et al. 51). On the other hand, arrange marriage mostly involves families meeting and making decisions on behalf of the marrying parties. In this type, the partners do not get a chance to engage in an informal courtship where they get to know each other deeper. Consequently, they will often need a substantial period of time to develop deeper inter-personal mutual connections (Pande 172).

While the above differences exist between the two types, challenges are inevitable in marriage regardless of the type. In a love marriage, love, which was the main binding factor, is likely to fade away with time. In an arrange marriage, the set of compatibility factors are likely to differ with time. Effective communication in both marriage types is critical for interaction. Both marriage types importune high level of trust and mutual respect between the partners (Regan 915).

Conclusion

A key insight that can be derived from the above discussion is that there is no perfect choice between a love marriage and an arrange marriage since both are likely to exhibit many diverse challenges in the post marriage life. Even though there are existing differences in terms of autonomy of the marrying partners and prior familiarity, these differences are usually meaningless in light of the long-term post-marriage life where everything gradually levels off.

Work Cited

Mir, Mohd Shoaib, Mohammad Amin Wani, and R. Sankar “Marital Adjustment among Love Marriage and Arranged Marriage Couples” The International Journal of Indian Psychology, vol. 3, no. 4, 2016, p. 51.

Pande, Raksha “I arranged my own marriage”: arranged marriages and post-colonial feminism”. Gender, Place & Culture, vol. 22, no. 2, 2015, pp. 172-187.

Regan, Pamela C., Saloni Lakhanpal, and Carlos Anguiano “Relationship outcomes in Indian-American love-based and arranged marriages”. Psychological reports, vol. 110, no. 3, 2012, pp. 915-924.

October 13, 2022
Category:

Family Life

Subcategory:

Love Experience

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649

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